...WITH LIFE
Life is a long winding road and there is no telling where it goes a lot of the time or even if there is, it often does not go as planned. And that is, I assume, there is the adage "it's not the destination, it's the journey" otherwise we would be living in a constant state of discouragement. That is where I have been mentally for some time, stuck pining over the destinations I could not reach and missing out of the events, monuments and sights passing me by as the journey continues and falling out of love with life as a result. But of course things never remain the same for too long and I have thankfully moved past that and that is the subject of this post, how I fell in love while gracefully leaving space for falling out of love with it again (this time with an understanding, as with all thighs, that it is a temporary feeling).
Talking
In this scenario I would equate talking nokubhodla; a deep groaning and purging by the soul where your words may not make sense to the listener (even if that listener is yourself) but by verbalising it you are clearing out and dusting off the confusion or despair which clouds you. If talking is not possible or comfortable then journaling is always an option (I am the journaling queen so of course I would find a way to work it in). You cannot address what you do not address. Talking is also beneficial as community is an important part of our wellbeing. So talking is not only for letting go but also to let in, to let people in and feel connected and supported.
Laughing
We all know that laughter is a great stress reliever, it helps relax our muscles and endorphins released by the act of laughing can help improve our mood. So I make it a point to get myself laughing as often as I can whether it is by being silly or watching funny videos or whatever makes you laugh. Laughter is also a great indicator of who you should surround yourself with, the people you laugh with the most are most probably the people with whom we have the most positive relationships and experiences (of course this is not always true).
Stop doing things you don't want to do, and attempt the things you want to do
Free will is as old as the earth itself, God had a discussion with the rest of the trinity about creating man which implies that they (the other parts of the trinity) had input and ability to say no or suggest alternatives. It is the same with us, me and you, we have free will. Capitalism may have us in a chokehold but there are still aspects we have control over, and these are areas we have the power to exercise free will in. Like not dating people who don't meet my standards just because I am bored or powering through a novel I am not finding enjoyable. Instead attempt things, it does not have to be with the intention to win/lose or succeed/fail. Attempting projects to satisfy my curiosity, create memories or to challenge my assumptions; of course we would not be throwing caution to the wind.
Mindful eating
For me mindful eating simply means being aware of how different foods make me feel then trying to have the discipline to stay away from foods that make me feel not great and being aware of food habits have a negative impact on my mood. It is practise I have been getting into after realising the impact that food plays in my mood and therefore my interactions, I have been working on my approach to food. Mindful eating also played out as using food to connect with people, intentionally sharing meals with people I want to create meaningful connections with.
Spiritual grounding
I privately struggle with the meaning and purpose of life, especially when going through some rough patch. What is the point of it all; of me being alive here, of the push and pull? I learned to not give these questions much of my curiosity because it turns dark and heavy pretty quick. Instead I try to focus on God, for me that relationship is balm for anxieties and fears which plague me. If I am in God's fold then I do not have to be stressing my little mind about the big bad scary world.
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